fujiwara armbar investigates: Dramatic Dream Team (DDT)

An occasional series in which, in a bid to further my spotty knowledge of Japanese wrestling promotions, I watch a recent event and assess whether or not I'd watch regularly given the time, money and ability to access.

Promotion: DRAMATIC DREAM TEAM (DDT)

Event watched: DDT Max Bump 2014, 29th April 2014, Korakuen Hall, Tokyo

What did I know about the promotion going in?: I knew a little bit. I knew that Kota Ibushi was one of the main players alongside his tag-team partner Kenny Omega. I knew that it was considered a 'comedy' promotion, or at least one with a stronger element of comedy as part of its regular presentation. I was passingly familiar with YOSHIHIKO, a puppet/sex doll treated with absolute reverence that wrestles in multi-person tag team matches.

I also knew a little about the DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Title, defended 24/7, similar enough to the WWE Hardcore Championship, but has been won by inanimate objects such as rice (which was 'pinned' by the roux ladled over it), ladders and posters, as well as by a trio of elementary school girls. Read this. Even if you never bother with the promotion, this is funny.

What is the history of the promotion?: Taken directly from this English language fansite (recommended reading): "a wrestling promotion that was set up by Sanshiro Takagi in 1997. DDT does wrestling differently when compared to the major Japanese promotions. Rather than follow the more serious and athletic style of wrestling, it instead takes the WWE option of being more about Sports Entertainment. Throw in the bizarre sense of humour Japan is known for and you have a very weird wrestling promotion indeed...DDT runs several sub-brands and offshoots, regularly experimenting the different ways wrestling can be done and presented."

These sub-brands include Union (heard of), Hard Hit (think this is a SHOOTO promotion), MUSCLE (never heard of it, a HUSTLE parody. I like HUSTLE), Cruiser's Game (sounds self-explanatory), BOYZ ("feature(s) handsome wrestlers from around the indy scene and is kept under the watchful eye of Johnny Edojima, who is played by Danshoku Dino", their next show is apparently for women only) and New Beijing (apparently a parody of New Japan as 'done by Chinese wrestlers', given the relationship of those two countries I'm going to guess it's not hugely flattering).

from the 2013 DDT event 'Sea Wrestling' (credit: Dramatic DDT)

And how was the event?: I'll do a brief-ish recap and I expect it will all come out in my tone. No star ratings as I'm not really sure of much of the context going into the events so there could have been all kinds of references that zoomed right over my head.

From the storied Korakuen Hall in front of 2200 very happy-looking punters (NJPW does 2015 as super no vacancy so I'm guessing their camera set-up means 185 people get nixed as a result. Victory here for DDT) we begin with a classic tecnico vs. rudo tag team contest between nice guy cruiserweights Shunma Katsumata and Chilean-born Guanchulo, and the less-inclined to fuck about Masa Takanashi and the not-at-all inclined to fuck about Yukio Sakaguchi. This was a good little match that would have worked nearly anywhere as it was funny but not over-burdened by comedy (the faces hit a double team move and went for a double pin and mimicked traditional kawaii poses) and won by the serious guy who was twice the size of everybody else, more-or-less.

The next section might take some explaining. The 999th Iron Man Heavy Metal champion is DDT founder Sanshiro Takagi. Part of his 'thing' is a lot of studied references to Stone Cold Steve Austin. His music hits with breaking glass, he carries the belt like Austin, he mounts the turnbuckles in the same manner and is generally a walking homage to probably the greatest American wrestler of the 90s.

We then cut backstage to a gaggle of wrestlers, the remaining contestants of this upcoming title-match battle royal. A mad scientist type is urging the workers to consume a magic potion he has concocted for reasons unclear to me and best left unchallenged. Seven of the workers down the liquid and immediately become incapacitated. One wrestler in a t-shirt of prog rock bores Yes, who I think was Yasu Urano, refuses to drink it. Antonio Honda enters the room in full make-up and then we cut back to the ring, where Takagi has been waiting all this time.

The coolest Rick Wakeman will ever get

Honda enters, followed by the seven wrestlers who have drunk the potion. They are now all mini-Hondas, complete with make-up. Urano sidles into the ring too, unaffected. The battle royal commences, with a lot of action on the outside. Honda appears to have the power of telekinesis over Takagi, commanding him to bump at will. Urano pins Honda, which was confusing at first but makes sense later. It's all pretty confusing but I'm going with it. Oh, and there was also something to do with the Incas (ancient people, not a DDT faction) that was 100% WTF.

The mad scientist chap comes back with new potion for the faux-Hondas. It turns out to be green mist, leading to a funny giant green-misting spot and Takagi taking advantage of their blindness to eliminate them and win the match, retaining his title.

Somewhere in these shenanigans, the mad scientist hits Takagi as he celebrates, leaving Takagi out cold and draped in his title. The referee counts three and the 1000th Iron Man Heavy Metal champion is...the Iron Man Heavy Metal Championship belt itself! Writing this up might have drained some of the comedy from it, but it was a lot drier and more subtle than it suggests. Good start so far, DDT.

A tag match pitting HARASHIMA and Tomomitsu Matsunaga against Konosuke Takashite and Tetsuya Endo kind of passed me by, but I remember thinking that HARASHIMA had a certain timelessness about him. HARASHIMA won, winning a briefcase similar to Money in the Bank. Apparently that's what also happened when Urano pinned Honda in the prior match.

Well this is nice

Prior to the interval we get serious as Jun Akiyama and Yoshinobu Kanemaru of All Japan Pro Wrestling (and in events transpiring between the end of this event and now, Akiyama is the new owner following another mass exodus/change in management) defend the prestigious All-Asian Tag Championship against Keisuke Ishii and Shihegiro Irie, representing DDT but also with a significant recent history within All Japan.

After a neat video package that I didn't quite follow but seemed to involve Ishii literally following Akiyama everywhere he went, the match pits Irie and Ishii as significant underdogs against two heavily-decorated men who were chosen for Kenta Kobashi's final match. Ishii is a good wrestler, Irie less so, though I like the way his green fauxhawk hairstyle compliments his elbow pads. From what I know about the business, that will get you far.

Akiyama and Kanemaru dominate the match, peeling back the ring mats and exposing the attractive parquet flooring of the Korakuen to drop their opponents head/body/back first onto them, but Irie and Ishii steal the win with a roll-up and the woman with the big certificate comes out to do the traditional presentational stuff. Fun stuff and nice to do a title change on a rival promotion's show, though one can't help but feel the belts have devalued a little since the days where Kobashi would lariatooo the hell out of Doug Furnas.

After an interval that showed some pretty fruity videos, we return with one of the wrestlers key to that fruitiness, Danshoku Dino, in a 6-man tag title alongside Makoto Oishi and YOSHI-HIKO. Dino lies at the heart of DDT in a pretty strong way and it's unearthing what you feel about his somewhat controversial character that might make-or-break this promotion for you.

You see, one of Dino's overwhelming characteristics is that he is gay. I don't know whether the worker himself is gay, but the character is 100% unambiguously gay. Gay in a 1970s Benny Hill sketch way. He kisses male audience members on the way to the ring and acts incredibly ostentatiously. Whilst his gayness is clearly a 'joke', it is never treated with phobic looks, nor is his capacity as a potential victor undermined by said gayness.

The fans seem to genuinely like him, though it's also hard to tell whether they're laughing at some satire aimed at stereotypical 'gay behaviour' or whether they enjoy and revel in his gayness. It'd be nice for everyone if we moved to a place where sexual orientation wasn't really even a thing, but there's an unashamedness about the whole thing so I am on the fence about this but tipping toward positivity. Or at least: a positive portrayal of a retrograde idea.

"y u no like me fujiwara?"

Dino & co's opponents are the 6-Man tag champions Kota Ibushi, Kenny Omega and Daisuke Sasaki. Straight away Omega and Sasaki go for YOSHI-HIKO, eviscerating his body and pulling his arms off. There's blood all over Omega, whilst the golden boy Ibushi looks fearful at the demons inside his partner. The match goes to three vs. two, and after brief spirited resistance, the champions hit their very cool-looking vaulting spike tombstone team thingy and it is game over. Omega drapes himself over Oishi and then the lights go out.

YOSHI-HIKO, seemingly reattached, 'runs' back to the ring and begins clearing house. In case you're wondering what kind of moves an inflatable sex doll can do, prepare to be amazed. Personally I can't believe Ibushi kicked out from this.

Eventually the champions retain and I can't really remember how though that really isn't the point. It was really good fun, and not just a match based around YOSHI-HIKO spots: Dino and Oishi were very good too.

The main event pits KO-D Champion KUDO against Akita. This was worked in a more serious fashion and I'll be honest it didn't do a whole lot for me. From what I could divine from a brief video and the in-ring, KUDO seems like a fairly legitimate champion-type: solid, all-around, believable, where his opponent Akita was perhaps not of his calibre (kayface) but with an MMA/submissions background. The home stretch was a good main event home stretch but it felt like a long time coming. KUDO retains.

Immediately afterward, Yasu Urano (he of the Yes t-shirt) cashed in his contract/briefcase/edict and also took on KUDO. KUDO won again, in a fine short match. The authority figure came out to congratulate KUDO. In case you're shuddering as I often am at the overplayed authority figure, this is DDT's.

Amon Tsurumi and yes he always looks like that (credit: Dramatic DDT)

After the official close, we cut to a backstage camera with Jun Akiyama looking grumpy in a quiet room. The Iron Man Heavy Metal belt is draped on a table. Akiyama leans, a referee counts three, and Akiyama becomes the 1001st champion. His face of complete bemusement is a real treasure and yet remains his most lighthearted moment of 2014.

What did you think?: That was pretty good! It certainly felt more sports-entertainment and at times that made the wrestling a little incidental, which means I'd struggle to truly enjoy it on a week-in/week-out basis. The really obvious base humour is always complimented by some quite surreal and slow-played turns that ensure that it's not just some end-of-the-pier roadshow turned cool because it's Japanese guys doing it instead.

I like the commitment to the whole premise from everyone involved, though I think I probably misunderstood a good 50% of it. It makes you realise for all the criticism of NJPW's lack of international focus re: commentary, their general package is much smoother and easier to follow for a non-native.

Post-show research: The mad scientist chap is called Poison Sawada JULIE. I should have mentioned that after this segment, he sat in on commentary looking straight-up WEIRD.

Verdict: If that was a standard DDT show, then it was fun and I'd watch another. It's strange to think that they're pretty big as the whole show was wrestled quite 'indy', with way more accessible for people in attendance than watching at home. 

NEXT: Inoki Genome Federation.